The Deepest, Darkest Secrets of the Zodiac Signs

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You shattered an irreplaceable heirloom during a tirade, Aries.You are technically an adult, but when it comes to expressing anger, you are the child of the zodiac. 


 A lifetime of ensemble planning based on the fact that she must never see you wearing a free investment piece is absolutely worth it.


Gemini: You have never concealed anything in your life.Sitting on rumors until your death is your idea of torment.



you were on your way to call his employer with a list of "client complaints" using a burner phone you keep on hand at all times. 


You are so interested in being the center of attention in your own life that you will tolerate even negative attention.

It is true that Virgos are self-flagellating individuals. Therefore, the minor offense you committed as a child continues to inform all of your excellent behavior today.



You invented enemies, Libra, because somewhere along the way in your quest to be adored by everyone, you discovered a few individuals you truly despise.


Scorpio.Go ahead and use a Jell-O mold to welcome your new neighbors and exchange pleasantries with them.


Sagittarians are receiving semi-regular cash infusions from your parents or partners or acquaintances or GoFundMe campaigns or whatever to fund your wild.


As a Capricorn, you are known for your professional integrity, and feeling like a charlatan is your worst nightmare. 


your two greatest passions are the future and being correct. So let's just cross our fingers that your quote from the student newspaper has been permanently archived.


When you were half an hour late for dinner because you were engrossed in a conversation with a stranger who had a fantastic canine tattoo, you blamed traffic.

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